What you don’t know can hurt you.
Domestic violence safety planning can make the difference between life and death. The pattern of abusive behavior called domestic violence is a cycle. Over time, this cycle continues to escalate. For a victim who is trapped in this kind of relationship leaving is hard.
The most risky time for a person is when a victim leaves. Many victims of domestic violence can’t “just leave”. An escape from this situation takes planning and thought. There is abet. If you are thinking of fleeing an abusive relationship you need a plan.
Call your local Domestic Violence shelter and ask to speak to an advocate. An advocate will not call 911 for you but an advocate can help advise you and give you the courage to go through with your plan. She or he can benefit you formulate a plan by helping you think of anything you may forget and let you know about resources or back that may be available to you.
If you are thinking of ending an abusive relationship it is important to do so with care. Document the abuse as much as you can. If you can do so safely, preserve a journal. Exhaust it to record incidents, types of abuse, dates and times. Photographs and copies of medical records that detail the abuse can help.
You can mild leave even if you do not have this documentation.
Other things to think about when ending a domestic violence relationship are:
Whine your family and friends. Let them know what it is going on. They deserve to know the truth and you deserve to have the support.
How you will get out of the house? If you have children how will you get them out?
Think about this ahead of time.
Plan how you will leave if you are in an argument that becomes dangerous. During an argument, try to go to a room that has an exit you can get to. Avoid rooms with objects that can be conventional as weapons. This includes the kitchen and the bathroom.
When you leave you will need cash. Debit cards and credit cards can be canceled on a moment’s notice. If you rely on these you may be stranded. Figure out how you can get cash and idea where you can keep it.
The same goes for cell phones. You may want to pick up an inexpensive cell phone on a pre-paid plan before you leave. Do not give the number to the abuser.
Other things that you might need are:
Clothing
Important papers
Drivers License
Insurance information
Court documents
Child custody papers
Medications
Diapers and formula
Kids comfort items
This list is not all inclusive. There may be other things that you may need given your own set. Talking with an advocate can assist you identify those items and create the best safety plan for your set.
For help creating a safety plan call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1.800.799.7233 or (TTY for the Deaf 1.800.787.3224)
Or follow the links in the resource section of this article.
Source:
Personal Experience
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
National Domestic Violence Hotline
U.S. Department of Justice
